1/19/07

Company ka prachar hai

Company ka prachar hai; aapka fayda. Whenever you enter any Roadways Bus, daily vegetable market or any similar crowded location in North India (UP) you will definitely hear these inaugural lines. Product will vary from pen, churna, pain killer, jewellery, Books etc. These products sound simple but they are not. They are best in class. For example painkiller will show fumes in daylight an fluorescence in night when applied on skin, it will give you instant relief just like miracle.
Best scientific explanation is given for these products. Just have a look to some marvellous ones.
GK Book: This book is must read for students preparing for prestigious IAS !! :) They must know following facts:
Sweat of hippo is pink in colour.
Sitapur (Near Lucknow) has a he-goat who gives milk :).
Mosquitoes have 42 teeth 10 more than human.
Thailand has a tree which cries like a baby.

Churna: Though it is just a churna it will cure most of your diseases. You can assume the power of this powder by these best selling lines.
Jab pet ki gandi gas dimaag se takraati hai to aankho ki light kamjor ho jaati hai. (When dirty gas of stomach hits the brain then eysight is dimmed.)

Subah subah jaatey hain, horn bajaatey reh jaatey hain magar gaadi platform pe nahin aati (They are talking about constipation) .

Ek haath roti mein doosra langoti mein khayen ki khujaayen samajh na aaye. (One hand in bread other in underwear. One should scratch or eat, cant decide.)

These products come in special offer which no one can resist.
Bye 3 pens for Rs.10/- and you will get pocket diary + key chain + refill.
If you bye G.K. book then you will get to choose 2 more bestsellers like Akbar Birbal jokes, Tota Maina story book, Filmi shayri etc.
If you are preparing for IAS or any other top exam(MBA), or you are suffering from any disease (including AIDS) then go get it.

1/10/07

Actors with Lifetime role

There are some actors who look same, act same in any or every movie they do. Those actors are known as actors with life time role. They are paid for doing same act again and again. If they try to act differently then movie is a flop. I am listing few of them ( In Alphabetical Order):

AK Hangal: Suffering poor old man. You can't even think him as young or rich. There are few movies where he tried wigs to look young and rich but failed to do so.

Alok Nath: Suffering father/uncle of a daughter. He is playing father figure role since childhood but recognised as filmi father since TV Serial Buniyaad when he played Master Haveliram.

Arshad Waarsi: Circuit. If he tries any other role then he flops. So sad.

Bob Christo: Another Foreigner

Dinesh Hingoo: Paarsi

Govind Namadev: Corrupt Neta/Policeman/Don. His outfit changes but his character remains same.

Iftekhar: Inspector/ACP/DCP. It is said that Police Uniform was part of their skin. Nobody could separate it from his body. In Sholay he played Jaya's father with shawl wrapped around him. What was he hiding under that? You guessed it right, Police Uniform :)

Jagdish Raaj: Inspector/ACP/DCP. Either he or Iftekhar played role of police man. If both of them were in same movie then Jagdish had to work under Iftekhar or had to join CBI/CID.

Keshto Mukharji : Drunkard

Pradeep Kumar: King or rich man. Watch any old period film like TajMahal to justify this.

Razzak Khan (Ninja chacha): Villain's sidekick who tries to do comedy or comedian who tries to be a villain.

Rishi Kapoor: Lover Boy/Man/Old man.

Sachin Khedkar: He must suffer or die in every other film.

Sanjay Dutt: Don.

Sunny Paaji: Macho Man, One man army.

Tom Alter: English Man. Without him we cannot portray foreigner in Hindi Cinema.

There are many more actors with life time role in bollywood movie like Sima Biswas (Kaamwali bai), Tikoo Talsania (Eeeeeeeeeeeee Seth/Rich man) , Sameer Khakhar Khopdi....